The playing never stops!

OH so much has happened since I last wrote.  The end of my last year was not so fun, so I am going to condense that part into one sentence...I was injured, sick and then injured again and as a result couldn't play for three months. There.  Now onto the good stuff!

A couple of very important things happened that changed the way I played and how I was learning.

I changed music teachers.
I was becoming increasingly frustrated by my first music teacher.  I think as a beginner music teacher she was great but lessons stagnated and I felt like I wasn't being listened to.  I was SO tired of playing nursery rhymes and out of children's books.  If I had to play Largo again I was going to cry.  It really wasn't her fault.  She was young and her first instrument was violin.  She wasn't really up to the task of teaching an adult beginner who already had experience with music.  I would bring pieces in that I wanted to play after searching the internet for music that I enjoyed and these would be set aside to follow a set curriculum of beginner books and...well...nursery rhymes.

Part of the problem here was that this music teacher was inexperienced.  The other part is that she worked for a standard music lesson company with a set curriculum to teach.  This is great if you need the structure and reassurance of curriculum, however at this point, for me, I do not.

I was also playing by myself all the time. The problem with this is that you don't learn to listen for the sound of a note or get to compare your playing to anyone else.  I had no idea if I was doing well or whether I should just give up because I was so crap. I absolutely yearned to play a duet or even just a piece with another cellist.  The other problem with playing music by yourself is that you can play any way you like, at whatever speed you want but part of the great joy of playing music is that feeling of creating something joyous with other people and I craved that.

By the end of my first year of playing I came to the realisation that I could either keep bashing my cello against this wall and lose my love for it, or I could find a new teacher and other people to play with.

Soooooo, I joined an orchestra.  The local community orchestra actually.  This was a benchmark day for me.  I had been working towards this goal, hoping to get there somewhere in 4 or 5 years as they require an AMEB Grade 5 level to join.  One day, I simply wrote them an email explaining my musical background and asking if I could just watch a rehearsal and maybe learn a few of the pieces they were playing.  They wrote back with the next dates of their rehearsals and suggested I bring my cello along and sit in the orchestra with them. So I did.  I showed up. Almost had a panic attack and just as I was about to leave...I was swooped upon, shown where to sit and once I sat down, there was NO escaping.  It was all kinds of wonderful.  Even though I was thoroughly confused and lost at times, I learnt SO much that first practise and all of a sudden I was MOTIVATED again.  The other cellists were so welcoming and really tolerant of my many desperate looks and missed notes.

It turned out that the head of the cello section also teaches.  So I started attending private lessons with her. I cannot explain what a difference it has made. We casually follow a set format to the hour lessons.
1.  Tuning.
2.  Scales first with an emphasis on controlling bowing and listening to sound for pitch and quality.
3.  Then pieces I am learning by myself.  I have been concentrating on Dotzauer's exercises 1 and 2 from his "18 Exercises for cello" which can be found FREE HERE
4.  Pieces that we are currently learning as duets.  I am learning, "The Entertainer" by Scott Joplin and arranged for cello by Kevin Mayhew, "Minuet" by Handel and "Duet No. 2" by Mozart which can be found HERE
5.  Understanding the notes that have been written on technique and practise homework during the lesson.

Christine always has her cello on hand.  Even when I play the solo Dotzauer exercises, there are times when she plays them with me and times when I play by myself.  I cannot stress enough how important it is to play the pieces with someone else.  I control my pitch better, I keep time better, it is a happier experience even when I get things wrong and my playing dissolves into something terrible to the ears.

One of the best things she does is watch me play, then try to work out what I am doing physically so she can SHOW me what I am doing and how to correct it.  It is invaluable learning by doing and seeing.  She ASKS what pieces I might want to learn, gives suggestions based on what I enjoy doing and even when I pick a piece that may be beyond my technical level at this point, always sees it as a great way for me to learn new things, no matter how long it takes, even if we have to learn it one bar at a time.

And she does it all with a great sense of humour and positive attitude.  Every music lesson, I move ahead with my playing and all of these things combined is what I really enjoy about my lessons now.

So that is where I am at in my 2nd year of playing this challenging instrument.  I look back on the journey and realise how far I have come and how I have enjoyed every step of the way so far.  I look forward to so many more and am ever so thankful for the day my partner stopped me outside a music store and said, 

"Hey! Look! There's a cello!"

I had these little beauties tattooed on my wrists in May!

Held together and holding on...

I appear to be held together with Gaffa tape. <sigh>

After a Doctor's appointment and physiotherapy, I have been strapped up and warned off playing for another week to allow everything to heal.  The good thing about talking to the physiotherapist was that the exercises and stretches will be tailored towards developing strength and endurance in the arm so I can get back to playing as soon as possible.  Every time I am tempted to take my arm out of the sling, I hear my doctor's voice saying, "Well if you would LIKE to dislocate your arm again and go to surgery and spend LONGER in recovery, feel free to walk around without it." <doublesigh> <slips arm back in uncomfortable and irritating sling>

I had a lesson on Saturday where I had to explain what I had done to myself, then sit in and listen to my daughter playing her exam pieces for an hour. We discuss a lot of technique and such for both violin and cello while the lesson goes ahead, so I get a lot of advice.  However, my fingers itch to pick up my bow and draw it across a string.  I find myself standing next to the cello and plucking the open strings with my good hand just to hear it whisper to me.

ENOUGH brooding.  I'm terrible at both patience and sitting around doing nothing, So what CAN I do?  Well I am so glad you asked...I can strengthen my bow hand.  I have been googling this as I am still fiddling around with my bow hold trying to find something both comfortable and practical.  My bow hand often gets tired after I have been playing for awhile and I know that part of this is because I am still tensing up a lot.  Some of it is because I am not holding the bow properly.  A lot of it is probably because hand and arm muscles are physically UNFIT for the task.

So, with my focus drawn towards the more physical aspects of playing at the moment, this momentary pause in my musical conversation has become an exploration of holding on...

There is some GREAT advice and tips in this forum post over at the Internet Cello Society forums...
http://cellofun.yuku.com/topic/7458/Itty-Bitty-Hands-A-bowing-problem#.UiPxcjZmjeg

LOTS of exercises here on all sorts of things at the Cello Professor
http://www.celloprofessor.com/Action-Studies.html

AND some informative videos here at Erik Friedlander
http://erik-friedlander.squarespace.com/cello-stuff/

State of mind

I am playing a piece that I am finding frustrating.  I know it is teaching me practical things...Finger extensions, a new key, patience <sigh>.  It is a simple little piece, "Allegretto" by Mozart.  The note lengths are easy, it is an uncomplicated tune. I still sound like the moaning of a walrus in its death throes.

Some days when I practice, I fly through new pieces.  My fingers hit the right spots, my timing is just right.  It is a joy and I feel like the cello and I are best friends having this great conversation.  I can spend hours playing at times like that.

Other days are a cranky pit of frustration complete with a dialogue of, "How can you not get this? How many times have you played that note wrong? How many more times are you going to playing that quaver as a crotchet?" The more I berate myself, the worse I feel and the worse I feel, the more terrible is my playing.  There comes a point where I have to just put the cello away.

When my attitude is bad, when it all feels like an insurmountable chore, it feels like I am fighting with my cello.  We are at odds and I need time and space to clear my head, improve my mood and come slinking back apologetically.

So right now, I am sulking.  But soon I will turn to face my cello, smile and be sorry I said such harsh words.  I will pick up the bow and start a new conversation.

P.S.  One thing I DID learn today though, was to check my bow to make sure it is properly rosined.  I was having a lot of trouble playing simple notes without excessive force and groaning, so I rosined my bow and found it made SUCH a difference.  I know it is something so fundamental to playing and making sound, but sometimes the littlest things still escape my notice.

Starting the Cello. Help.

So, I am the ripe old age of 38, and at this age, possibly as part of a mid-life crisis, I have decided that I am going back to playing music, and the Cello is going to be my instrument.

This is not the first instrument I have played.  I played my way through most of the brass/woodwind section.  My main  instrument was the trumpet.  I played it for about 15 years before I burnt out and went on to study Art and Science instead.  I should probably mention at this point that I have never had any natural affinity with strings whatsoever.  I tried playing guitar.  Best that I left that behind.  I tried violin.  I sounded like a cat being tortured by the machine in Princess Bride that takes Wesley's life.  

I have since then, collected a few instruments here and there.  A beat up old cornet.  A flute. A couple of flutes actually.  I was so close to buying a lovely old wooden clarinet, but budget restraints stopped me.  I bought a very old piano.  I stopped playing trumpet though.  I lost a lot of the fun and the love I had for playing when I stopped playing with other people.  I have picked it up every now and again.  Opened the case.  Oiled and inspected.  Played a few notes.  Become frustrated at my lack of muscle tone, breathing.  Polished it lovingly and put it back in its case.  

Then one day, we were walking past a music store.  My partner pointed out a cello in the window.  he literally said, "Look, there is a cello." I stopped.  Looked. Forgot to breathe.  It was like falling in love. I listened to the musician in the shop play it and we bought it. That day.  That moment.  I can hear some of you more experienced cellists gasping at me.  No, I really had no idea what I was looking for in a cello...just that I must have it.  That day, I bought a Valencia student cello.  There is nothing fancy about it, it has the strings it came with on it.  I use the bow it came with.

I bought it home and started playing.  I plucked for hours.  I watched videos.  I read music.  Music that was WAY beyond my skill and technique.  I started easier music.  I used a tuner app on my iphone to tune the strings and find the notes of the first position.  I sounded terrible.  Really terrible.  It was a long fall from playing in orchestras at such a high level to go back to playing nursery rhymes as a beginner again.  I loved every minute I played.

It was at this time with my 11 year old daughter watching on, that she decided she wanted to play her violin again.  She had spent a year learning at her primary school, but by the end of the year, she had not even learnt to play the simplest things, did not know where her fingers should be positioned or how to hold a bow. This time around, she really listened.  She asked me questions about reading music.  She wanted to learn some pieces with me.  It has made all the difference in the world.

A couple of weeks later, we found a teacher willing to teach us both together.  She has been a marvel.  Patient. Supportive. Knowledgeable.  So we do an hour lesson every fortnight.  I usually take the first 30 minutes, then my daughter takes the 2nd.  We hear each other play and learn together.  When we practise, we remind each other what we have learnt in class.

It has now been about 6 months since we started.  I am learning.  Slowly. So slowly, but in the learning I am finding patience and wells of concentration I didn't realise I had.  I am learning from a few books.

I started with Essential Elements 2000 for Strings (Cello Book One)  http://www.simplyforstrings.com.au/store/index.php?route=product/product&manufacturer_id=24&product_id=655 

and have moved onto Essential Elements 2000 for Strings (Cello Book 2)
http://www.simplyforstrings.com.au/store/index.php?route=product/product&manufacturer_id=24&product_id=656

Cello Time Runners has been a regular source of easy practising music
http://www.simplyforstrings.com.au/store/index.php?route=product/product&product_id=752

Cello Series 1 Preliminary Grade AMEB 
http://www.whitehorsemusic.com.au/p/378059/clearance-ameb-cello-series-1-grade-preliminary-exam-pieces.html

Cello Series 2 Grade 1 AMEB
http://www.simplyforstrings.com.au/store/index.php?route=product/product&manufacturer_id=16&product_id=983 

I have been inspired by
2cellos a.k.a. Luka Sulic and Stepjan Hauser
http://www.2cellos.com/us/home
http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyjuFsbclXyntSRMBAILzbw

The Piano Guys
http://thepianoguys.com/
http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmKurapML4BF9Bjtj4RbvXw






Most of surprisingly of all, over the past 6 months of learning and trying, of frustration and triumph, I have found that the love I had for the music I played never really went away.  It just lay quietly, waiting for the day when I would turn its way again and listen.